(I was once upon a time known as The King Of Violence… The Emperor Of Extreme. Mr. Hardcore Fucking 101. I have forgotten more about hardcore wrestling than most of these fucking posers will ever know. I don’t detest hardcore wrestling… because I can’t survive and thrive in the style… I detest it because plain and simply hardcore wrestling sucks. It shortens and ends careers… hell it shortens and ends lives. The world and the business will be a whole hell of a lot better once hardcore wrestling is but a faded memory. If I have my way myself and my family will eliminate hardcore wrestling once and for all. People may resent us for it at first but they’ll certainly thank us in the long run.)


(I am currently dressed in a royal blue suit with white pin stripes, a golden color dress shirt minus a tie, and a pair of black dress shoes shined to the point you can see your reflection in them. I am  sitting in my office smoking a cigar and begin addressing the camera. )


Tees: Psycho Asylum it hadn’t occurred to me previously that both of you are indeed women. So my concern is completely gone. No woman could possible defeat me and certainly no woman could have a prayer of defeating Mr. Goldstein the one and only rightful world’s heavyweight champion of this Godforsaken wrestling organization. Myself and Mr. Goldstein have wrestled around the world. We have competed in front of kings, queens, presidents, emperors, popes etc so on and so forth. You are looking at two of the greatest wrestlers to ever set foot inside of a wrestling ring. But the thing is we have beaten men…. Very very tough and dangerous men. You two are both women… and although myself and Goldstein prefer to wrestle women in a different way (inside the bedroom.) we are more than prepared to throw you an equal opportunity beating due your stupidity of signing on the dotted line to set foot in the squared circle against us. We will put you both back into all too familiar positions first on your knees so that you can kiss Mr. Goldstein’s ring for he is the golden goose… the cash cow and above all else the rightful champion of this promotion. And once we have done this we’ll put you on your backs for the victory. We know you are more than used to being in these two positions if you catch my drift. Women have no business being in the ring with men… especially men of the caliber of myself and Mr. Goldstein the future tag team champions of the ESW… you have both been warned.


Tees: Uprising we haven’t heard anything from you and you would be well suited to continue to follow the trend that you have started by not even showing up. Unless you want to be on the receiving end of a massacre and a bloodbath It wouldn’t be a good idea to show up and get in the ring with myself and Goldstein. We may detest and despise everything about hardcore wrestling and those who epitomize the dreadful style but we can get as violent, barbaric, sick and sadistic as anyone else. Whatever it takes to win and the ends always justify the means.

(With that my secretary Temptress comes in as I continue smoking my cigar. The scene fades out as Temptress begins rubbing my feet.)