We are live ladies and gentlemen at “Goldstein’s Club And Resort” in gorgeous San Juan, Costa Rica. It’s a lovely day, sun is shining, birds are signing and it’s one of those truly wonderful and amazing days where one is happy to be alive. It also happens to be Father’s Day for many, but that’s another story for another time. Lou Bega’s “Mambo No. 5” plays as three golfers tee off at exactly the same time each sending their balls long distances from where they are standing. One is dressed in a light blue polo shirt and wearing light tan pants, another is wearing a navy blue polo with darker khakis and the third is wearing a black polo with navy colored pants. We see various cocktail waitresses dressed in skimpy outfits as the music continues playing. Finally we come upon the star of this show the one the only Mr. Goldstein. Goldstein is sitting at a table drinking a vodka martini, straight up with an olive just the way he likes it. Goldstein wears a pinkish colored polo, and although you can’t see them a pair of Khaki cargo shorts, his trademark aviator sunglasses are also present and his long blonde hair appears to be slicked back. Standing right next to him is his bodyguard, associate and close personal friend/occasional tag team partner David Von Tees. Von Tees wears a rather unique Polo shirt that is a dark, navy blue color with his initials DVT in gold lettering. And to contrast this a pair of off white colored shorts some refer to as “Sand Dune.” Oh and raisin colored boat shoes for those who don’t know what constitutes “Raisin colored.” Think of a reddish brown.Goldstein begins speaking.
Mr. Goldstein: Hello again Peons, peasants and piss ants, it is I Mr. Goldstein a man who is superior to you in both imaginable and unimaginable ways. Most of you know who I am, some of you may not but when all is said and done all will bow and tremble before me with fear and respect, they will all kiss my ring (shows a large diamond ring with engravings.) and revere me as their king.
Mr. Goldstein: I have come here to SWF for one reason and one reason only to elevate it to a much higher level, to become it’s franchise, it’s golden goose and believe me when I tell you SWF has invested wisely as only I… Mr. Goldstein am fit and deserving to hold such a position. Oh, how rude of me. I forgot to introduce this large mountain of a man… or monster if you will. This man standing behind me is my associate David Von Tees. In the past he has used such names as Devastation…. Das Ungeheuer and others but whatever you call him he’s lethal and dangerous. I’m a very rich and powerful man, who has made quite a few enemies… there are countless jealous people in the world who wish they were me… so I had no choice but to go out and spend what to most of you would be a small fortune but to me is mere peanuts to purchase the services of the best bodyguard in the business.
Mr. Goldstein: I live a life few can merely dream of and have slept with exotic and beautiful women that most men can only fantasize about… and my next move is to take what became mine the second I was born the top spot in SWF… anyone foolish enough to stand in my way will be put in their place and taught a much deserved lesson in humility.
Mr. Goldstein: My time here in SWF will be but a mere day at the beach or an afternoon at the country club smooth sailing as I don’t see anyone who can counter my intelligence, my skill, my intestinal fortitude, my cunning, my ruthlessness or anything that makes me the great and powerful man that I am. So, although my ascension will be a positive and pleasurable experience to yours truly it should prove to be a nightmare to everyone else. And there is one particular “misfit” who will soon get a rather unpleasant personal introduction shortly that person knows who they are and knows why I am coming for them. Until next time au revoir
Fade out with Goldstein doing his signature laugh which is a bit of an evil cackle. He then flashes a serious expression as the expressionless face of Von Tees is shown.