Tees: Funk… Oh Funk… Terry where are you?
(Tees continues looking but doesn’t see Terry Funk anywhere. Finally he hears a loud moaning sound coming from one of the dressing rooms. He enters the room to find three or four bottles of what appears to be a foreign brand of whiskey that he hasn’t seen or heard of before. He picks up one of the bottles and notices that the logo appears to be Japanese lettering. Upon further investigation he discovers Terry Funk passed out on the locker room floor. He heads over to him.)
Tees: Hey I’ve been looking all over for you and then I find you here passed out on the floor?
Terry Funk: Whoa… Keep it down my head is killing me… I had the strangest dream I ever had in my life. Something about me and Liger heading to NYC and hitting the town…. And then sleeping in the same bed after doing these 19 year old twin sisters. Talk about weird that Japanese whisky just didn’t agree with me.
Tees: Well you probably drank way too much… you my friend might potentially have a drinking problem… you’ll want to put that in check as you and Liger have a tag match this week and next week you’re going for the Intercontinental championship.
Terry Funk: Nah… I don’t have no damn drinking problem unless of course I can’t get a drink. I have my alcoholism well under control and happen to enjoy it.
Tees: That doesn’t make a lick of sense.
Terry Funk: It does to me.
Tees: Well… you still sound hammered so of course it would. Clean this place up… clean yourself up we’ve got a promo to do and preparations to make.
(Quite a bit of time passes and Terry Funk has cleaned up well. He is now wearing a western style suit with a cowboy hat looking every bit the part of J.R. Ewing. Liger is now wearing a royal blue and white version of his ring attire complete with cape and since Tees didn’t need to change anything and is still wearing his suit from previously. Only now they are joined by Sean Mooney in the locker room. This particular locker room contains a pay phone by a set of lockers and will probably look familiar to many people as it’s been used several times before. Mooney begins speaking to the camera dressed in a pair of gray pants and a dark blue sport coat with a WWF logo in gold. )
Sean Mooney: Hello… everyone I’m Sean Mooney please join me in welcoming my guests at this time along with their manager Big Daddy Tees… Terry Funk and Jushin “Thunder” Liger collectively known as The Syndicate.
Tees: Pleasure to be here Mooney of course the pleasure is all yours of course.
Mooney: Gentleman this week Terry Funk and Jushin Liger will be facing the team of “The Morbid Marvel” Sykko and “Too Good” Jon Roth two men who call themselves “The Loud Violent Riot.” What are your thoughts?
Tees: Well… Mooney our thoughts are so simple that even the simpleton’s watching this right now can understand them. Regardless of whether anyone likes it or not, The Syndicate are going to take all of the belts. We already have the main championship which sits around my gorgeous waist (points to the WWF championship) we just need the rest. Defeating The Loud Violent Riot this week will put us one step closer to the tag team championships and next week Terry Funk will absolutely annihilate… either Raven or that freak Mighty Voovoo. It makes no difference to us which one makes it past the other. Neither man is on Terry Funk’s level or of his caliber and both will fall in defeat. The end result will be Terry Funk standing tall with BDT by his side holding the Intercontinental championship high in the air.. Restoring that lost prestige and honor that has been missing from the championship for as long as I can remember.
(Tees needed a break so Terry Funk began speaking as Mooney simply held the microphone like a brain dead moron.)
Terry Funk: I can be loud and I can be violent and I’ve been known to cause a few riots. The Loud Violent Riot are just cheap imitations of Terry Funk. Neither man is capable of carrying my jock strap…. And I’ll prove it to the world. You boys talk big knowing that you can’t back it up. You’re going to learn a lesson you’ll never forget a lesson in how to truly be loud… truly be violent and how to truly cause a riot… this will be more like a blood bath your blood being spilled all over our ring… all of the simple minded people know that Terry Funk always does what he says he’s going to do and I just told you what’s going to happen this coming Monday.
(Liger began talking at that point.)
Liger: You two punks should have a healthy fear of us… but you obviously don’t and have shown us a complete and total lack of respect…. We’ll certainly correct that as we’ll beat the fear into you. Me and Terry Funk have collectively and individually competed all over the world amassing an extensive collection of championship titles. We have the WWF tag titles on the list to be added to our collection and add them we shall…. Neither you nor anyone else is going to stop us on our road to the top. We are international superstars and you are just a couple of ham and eggers with big egos who need to be put in their place.
(Tees finished things out)
Big Daddy Tees: Loud Violent Riot you have been warned and the bells now toll for you and when bells start rolling heads start rolling see you punks on Monday.
Mooney: Thank you for your time.
Tees: Once more Mooney the pleasure was totally yours this interview is over lets bounce boys.
(Tees, Liger and Funk made their exit as the camera faded out.)